Thursday, February 02, 2006

good housekeeping?




April 10, 2003

Bernadette
San francisco, CA
Two children - twin boys (6)


I am Pissed! I am working everyday to become the kind of woman I have dreamed of my entire life and suddenly I am being told basically that something as small as housework should stand in the way of me and what I am trying to experience. Why would someone who could 1) afford a housekeeper (once a week mind you) and 2) have other activities of greater quality and value to them that can be undertaken in place of the housework, not hire a housekeeper? I learned a very valuable lesson from a wise woman today about delegating tasks evenly so as to leave time to do what you enjoy, what motivates and makes you happy so that you want to wake up everyday and do this thing called life over and over again. But somehow wanting this, not only for myself but for my family turned into “That’s a waste of money,” “That’s just lazy,” “Why would an able-bodied person need a housekeeper?”

I’ll tell you why; because I deserve clean floors and long leisurely hours with my children. Because I want to sit on clean toilets and not have to sacrifice time to work out and stay fit and healthy. Because I never want to see grease
behind my stove or on the side of my refrigerator and that should not have to cost me the
opportunity to read or sit or nap or do whatever the hell I want to do with that freed-up time that I more than deserve and have worked for.

There are never any complaints when I spend sixty or seventy dollars on dinner or forty dollars on lunch but forty-five dollars a week to pay someone to clean the kitchen and bathroom is above us? Because that’s what I hear. The fear in his accusing voice says, “Who do you think you are? We’re not those kind of people. We work. We Hustle. We are not there yet.” People should really consider that there is so much more in life than what was drilled into our heads under our parents’ roof.

It’s okay to do a new thing. That thing that suits you and your lifestyle. That thing that makes you happy and genuinely fulfilled. People should examine whether they are happy and fulfilled or just reading the already written lines.

15 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

get the house keeper!

just yesterday i was thinking to myself that i need to pay the woman at the laundromat to do my laundry. there just isn't enough time & i don't want to spend my weekends (basically the only REAL time i have w/ my son), slaving over dirty clothes. i say...naysayers be dammed...do what you need to do for you & your family. it that means hiring someone, so be it. look at it this way...you pay someone to wash your car & no body bats an eye...what makes this any different?

~britni

10:31 AM  
Blogger Gay said...

"I feel you". I experience the same frustrations, but never thought about hiring a housekeeper. But a housekeeper would free up my time and energy to play with my twin girls (age 10) at the of my work day.
My thoughts have leaned towards having my girls in the kitchen cooking with me, setting the table with me, sorting and doing laundry with me, cleaning up the house with, me, etc. But your solution, (hiring a housekeeper)is what I really need to work towards.

10:44 AM  
Blogger Miss Ahmad said...

get the housekeeper!

my mother said it long ago that she wasn't going to spend her life cleaning up after us. instead she was going to make sure we ate well, got accepted into good colleges and that the time she had with us was quality!

she always said a whole lot of things would go before she let go of the housekeeper. mine is here right now, and she's the best thing that's happened to me. she allows me to be creative and feel pampered...

2:47 PM  
Blogger Icey said...

amen!!! housekeepers are true life savers!!! been there done that! will do it again!

12:29 PM  
Blogger Supa said...

Love this post! Amen. My mom was similar to yours, Ms. Ahmad. :) And I've followed in her footsteps.

First time at the site, will definitely be back!

10:39 AM  
Anonymous dirjon said...

I feel you! I struggle to hold down a demanding job, keep my marriage together and raise my daughter (basically 3 full-time jobs) and I spend too much time fretting about, working around and DOING housework. The next raise or better-paying job I get, I am hiring someone to clean my house, even if just every 2 weeks someone comes to do the floors, bathrooms, kitchen, carpets.

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Blogger upwords said...

Girl, you have said a mouthful. I'll be back around here for sure.

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